Sunday, January 29, 2006

one week

It's been a week since my last post-"the smell of sunday". Since then I have started, stopped, and deleted many attempted postings, because I just like the last one so much, and I don't know how my normal writings would look when sandwiched around it.
I have been exceedingly busy as of late, but will resume a half-assed regular posting schedule sometime soon=pro'lly during the week.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

The smell of sunday

I recently realized that one of the things missing in my life was the smell of sunday. This was an odd realization, because I didn't realize that days of the week has a scent in the first place, and that, given this information, sunday didn't smell like what I thought.
Until about three weeks ago, I would wager that sunday smelled like food. Eggs, bacon, sausage, toast, gravy, pancakes, and sweet rolls in the mornings, long cooked meal in the evening. Orange juice, coffee, tea, and cold milk at anypoint in between. Now, all these are part of the smell, but only part. What had been missing was the scents of cleaning. Not a clean smell, that is different, but the smells of the vacuum, fresh mop water, glass cleaner, kitchen cleaner, dish soap and dishwasher detergent, laundry soap, an dryer sheets, all rolled into an amalgam.
Clean is a smell relatively pleasant, but devoid of anything in particular. cleaning is a combination of scents, astringent, sweet, warm and mechanical, cool water down the disposal, wiped off counters....

Sundays are chore day in my house. Monday mornings, the house smells clean, before it smells like coffee, but sunday nights, it smells like home should...lived in, improving, changing, growing, accomedating, welcoming, comforting.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

never enough time-hectic! hectic! vs all's good, plenty of time, calm

All last week I was able to stay nicely on top of things, my house stayed clean, my dishes stayed done, my meals were planned, and my kids were happy. I was even waking up earlier to take care of BabyBear. This week, I have had a much more hectic and rushed, not enough time, sort of feeling. We were all sick over the weekend, and most of us are still in recovery. The house is still clean, and way cleaner than what I used to call clean, but not as tidy as I'd like, just some general clutter type things. I haven't let my dishes pile up, but I haven't been steying completely on top of them either. I couldn't figure out why I had plenty of time and energy last week, but was feeling so bogged down thus far this week. At first, I thought it must be the change in hours I was keeping, but no, I was getting less sleep at night, so napping off and on during the day, when able, so that wasn't it. Then I thought that it must be that we ahve all been sick. Yeah! That must be it, but, no...that's not it either. Hubby was home both monday and tuesday, anything that I felt really needed to be worked on, I could've done. Wait a minute, let's back up a sentence, "...anything I felt really needed to be worked on...: Ahhh, we've found the difference. Last week I just did. I decided what needed to be done, and I did it, immediately, or as close to immediately as I could. It never took long, and it was over, and thus plenty of time and calm. This week, I have been a procrastinator. I have put off doing things until they HAD to be done. When this happens, almost everything HAS to be done, AT ONCE!!! Okay, I think I found it. To quote trite and cliche'd commercials from my youth- "Just Do It".

Oddly enough, the key to my having enough time seems to be doing more, more often. Not doing everything, not doing too much, but doing just over enough, on a regular basis, and you start to get ahead. Somehow, I think my finances are working in the same way, as is almost everything else. If I keep up with being calm and getting it done, I will have the time to take care of me, even after baby#3 arrives, and I like that, I need that.


Friday, January 13, 2006

The incredible growing toddler, plus the w-2 that ate Eagan

Littleman might need a new blog-name. He is fifteen months old today, now firmly entrenched in being a toddler. He had himself a well child check-up today that included two shots( MMR and DTp-I immunize my children, I have no moral or ethical qualms with doing such, and even allow product that might be animal based-GASP!!, plus I know what all the acronyms and abbreviations mean!) He is cranky because of this, but get's some wee one tylenol-so that's OK. We also weighed, measured length, and measured head circumference. He is 26pounds 12.75 ounces (%80 for kids his age-meaning only %20 of 15 month olds are heavier) 33and a half inches (%97), and his head? 19.75, that equals out to %99. Big damn head!

Hubby got his W-2 form today. That means that I get to file our taxes!!! Well, I get to e-file our fed. If I want to e-file state, I have to wait...that sucks..but YAY Tax Return time!!!!

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

not enough sleep, too much weight, there really is a connection!!

I was baffled when my doctors suggested sleeping more as a way to cope with my excess weight gain. This baffled me, but went well with their suggestions of getting more rest, more excersize, and less stress-if I could do all of those things-I would be thrilled. I figured that more sleep would equal more energy, so I could excersize more, excersize decreases stress levels-supposedly, I'd be getting better rest afterwards, and so on, and so on, and so on....
It turns out that not getting enough sleep causes your body to produce deficient amounts of a protien/chemical/hormone/something called Liptin. Liptin is produced when you are full, it tells your body to stop craving carbohydrates. If you are not producing enough, you will have fierce carb cravings, no matter how full you are, and we all know a craving will not go away unless it's fed. Well, these cravings won't! It's Evil!!
Iffin I were not preggers, there is a medication that could be given untill I am able to get enough sleep again, but untill I either have the kid and quit breastfeeding, or until I get enough sleep and rest and excersize for my body to self correct the problem, I'm SOL.
Oh, and lets not forget that excess carbs can affect insulin levels, and WHEEE, more things to toss on the pile.
What the game plan is for now, is to take things easy, and get my nose to the excersize grindstone after the babe is born.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

feeling "housewifey"

This weekend was the inaugeral weekend for the "Chore Wheel". Marvel at it's organization glory! For those of you who are not in the know, a chore wheel is a way to evenly and fairly devide the household chores amongst the populace of a home. In our case, we have four people of weekly chore doing age, and made four groups of chores. Everyweek the wheel rotates, so throughout the course of a month, everyone will have cleaned every common area once. On top of this is the general care and maintenance, but with the rest of the house clean, I can focus on the maintenance. I have had a clean house, with everyone fed, and the dishes done, by no later than eight p.m. for the last few days. I have been able to make and drink coffee, in the mornings, with no problems or guilt-my kitchen and living room are clean! (I did not make coffee this morning, as my Crock-Pot was taking up the outlet normally made available for the coffeepot, and I didn't feel like moving the pot.)
I still need to do the boys room-but it is a little overwhelming. small children have a lot of stuff, and the stuff gets all over, and we are working with Bigguy on taking care of his stuff, a concept he is much better at since we began enforcing a one-toy-or-set-at-a-time policy, but the stuff that was already out needs a home! I can work on their room now, and know that the rest of the house has been taken care of, so that if someone is in the area, and just happens in-I do not need to appologize for the mess! I feel like a good housewife right now-and it's nice.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

pain meds...ladedadeda

First, I am on Percoset right now, and for those of you who do not know, that is oxycodone and acitominophine-wheeeee- appaerently, oxycodone will pass into breastmilk but will not cross the placenta-whereas codine-which isn't as strong, will not enter breastmilk, but could potentially fuck up a fetus by crossing the plecanta like mad.
A brief baby timeline update-optimally, I will have baby#3 in early april, pre tax-day, post april fool's day. Anytime after about the thirteenth of march(just over nine weeks from now), though technically early, would put us in the clear devolopmentally, lungs fully formed, and not technically a preemie, just a little early to the party. Also, if the Dr's have any concerns about my health, 3/13 is the date they do not want to deliver before if at all possible. Since my blood pressure is good, and I have no abnormal protiens or sugars as of yet, we will not worry about that. Between march 1 and march 13 is doable if absolutely neccesarry with very little risk, as long as we have 24-48 hours within which to administer a specific sterioid in shot form to jump start fetal lung maturaty, and thus, be mostly ok after some brief monitoring. anything before then(so any time in january or february) is moslty forbidden-so untill we hit the safety point-no stress, less sodium, more excersize(but not exhaustive excersize-no heart rate over 140bpm for me), more rest, and more sleep. Weeeee

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

thoughts on life and death

I cannot quite remember how old I was when I realized death was permanent. When I was rather young, I want to say 7, I visited my dad and step-family in california. When I came home, both my "grandfather"-(my mom's step-dad) and my best friend at the time, another 7 year old girl had passed away. I remember being much more upset about my friend, and feeling guilty that I missed her more, but I also remember thinking that it would be ok, I could make it up to them later. I know that when my grandpa-(my dad's dad), passed on, I was 11, and I knew he wasn't coming back, no matter how much I wanted him to, if for no other reason than to yell at him for being gone.
In Bigguy's four and a half years on this planet, we have had, on average, one funeral a year to attend. Actually, I think it was two his first year, then a year off, then one a year since, but on average, one a year. He has attended all but the very first, as he would not have been more than six months. Oddly enough, we brought him to the next funeral, when he was only about nine months without a second thought. When we had a beloved pet die, we explained to him, at three, that the cat was gone, and wasn't coming back, but might have some sort of kitty afterlife. He seemed satisfied with that. When his brother was born, just a few months later-I allowed Bigguy into the dilivery room, but only in between rather painful contraction, and only when I was fully covered.
It's odd, according to some of my friends, that I let him be exposed to death, but I do not let him witness a new life come into the world. For a while, I could not come up with what I felt was a valid arguement other than the trump of "I'm his mother, and that's how I do it." Over the last few months, however, I have come up with a much more satisfactory(in my mind) answer, one that I am going to share here.
It has been proven that when a small child, and by small child, I am referring to any child under the age of eight-needs a secondary support person, just for them, if they are to witness their mother giving birth. It is an overwhelming sensation on many levels-beside being very graphic visually, the sounds are frightening, and they do not cope well with seeing anyone in pain, let alone a parent. Secondly-and quite possibly most importantly-My son witnessed funerals and wakes, the rituals we surround ourselves in to mourn someones passing and celebrate their lives-he did not witness an actual death. He has seen a brand new, minutes old, baby, and knows that the baby grew inside a mommy, and that the baby came out of mommy-he has been at showers for babies, and has attended birthday parties-both his own and others. He does not need to witness a live birth, by a family member, to understand the concept.
Maybe, as he gets older, he will have some issues, like I did, with understanding completely that they don't come back, but I also think he will realize that as long as you remember-they are never truely gone.

As an aside-this is very near the aniversary of the arson fire that caused the death of a family member, and the destruction of many objects that we can never get back. Make sure you make copies of pictures, and documentation you want your family to have, and put them somewhere safe. Also, make sure your loved ones know they are loved, you never know when it will be too late.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Good news

Of our two basement-dwelling roommates, one is Bro-in-law, and the other is a good friend. Good friend just took his liscence test today, and he passed, just barely, but passed none the less. Now he just needs to get a car and my life becomes a little bit easier. Now that everyone with the exception of Hubby is liscenced(of the people who are of age), Hubby can get in gear to get his test taken. He plans on being street legal by the time baby#3 is born, even if that means taking his test in the snow and ice. WooHoo. Coupled with the work we will be having done to the mini-van with some of our tax return $$, and we will be a fully mobile household.

More good news-my Dr has cleared my for the next three weeks. To be clear, three weeks from now would still be way too early for baby#3 to be born, but I shouldn't go into labor before then, or immediately afterwards. I am supposed to get more rast, more excercize(sic), less sodium, more sleep, and the big one-Less Stress-yeah, like I can just eliminate stress at will, and I haven't yet. We are still having an almost unheard of weight-gain, especially when my diet is taken into account, but everything else is liiking relatively ok. My back is f!@#ed up, but I have some handy-dandy pain killers to take at bedtime, thus relieving the back pain and helping with the sleep. Also, proper excercize should help alleviate back tension and if we can control the weight, that should help. All else failing, I hope for a healthy babe, and start doing Pilates ASAP after the kid is born. I really like Pilates, but cannot do it while pregnant, and I don't like the versions that have been modified for pregnancy.

Defunct-Dad news-I still haven't heard anything, and after my innitial rant about what a bastard he is for letting his grandkids go without a fight, I really couldn't care less. I have decided that this year I will celebrate what I have, and be good with that.