Todqay, Thor, my middle son, is 4 years old.
Yesterday, we had a special dinner, and we had cake. The closest we could get him to understand was that it was, and I quote Thor here "Happy Birthday to you for me to eat, cake!"
Same with the presants, he was happy to get them, but he is so fuzzy on the concept of birthdays, and how they apply to him, that I think that we could habe done nothing, and it wouldn't have mattered to him.
At 4, we are partially potty trained, which for a normal 4 year old isn't all that much, but for him, on the spectrum and with sensory issues, is HUGE. When given a choice, he will consistantly choose training pants over a pull up, and will even wear his Elmo uderwear on some days, a major feat, as he will only wear them on days where he is confident he can urinate and defecate on the toilet, as he will not risk gettin Elmo wet or soiled.
At 4, he is talking more. If he cannot come up with the word he needs, or cannot say the word he needs (due to texture reasons, mostly) he may use 18 words to say something simple, like "I need more mmmmm nummy milk for the drinking at nappy time please" instead of "Could I have more milk please" or even "Fill my sippy cup"
At 4, he will talk alot if allowed to sing or ad a -y sound to the end of words. Nap time is nappy time, dinner or lunch or breakfast is "food for the eaty time" but he is learning.
Sometimes, it is like living with a larger Yoda.
He laughs all the time. Everything as funny. He apologizes for everything,. We don't even know what, half of the time, he will just walk up, give a hug, and say "Oh, Boo Sorry!"
He gets very upset if things are not done right, although 'right' is a flexable concept we will never understand. Sometimes the pants need to go on first, sometimes the socks, sometimes we have to wear shorts under the pants.
He has no idea yet that he is different from other kids. No clue that how he plays more closely resembles a three year old than a 4 year old. No clue that he doens't speak right, that not every kids needs to have things done in a certain way, that not every kid gets the option of running around mostly naked just because we canno0t find any clothes today that don't make us freak out.
He is also a very typical 4 year old. He gets into trouble, throws tantrums on occasion, gets out in time out. Granted, he will 'trade' his time out with Loki. He gets into Hermes room, and decided that it is all his.
I do not know any more now than I did 2 years ago, when he was first diagnosed, what the future holds for him. I know that I will always do my best by him, though, and I will always be there for him. I know that it is normal for parents with kids like mine ti need a vacation from their kid, and to feel guilty forn eeding it.
I know that he loves me, and he doens't care that some days I am a hot mess. I am momma, and Momma is good.
I know he loves Hubby, even though somedays Hubby can be a flaming asshole, as he isPoppa, and Poppa is great.
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